September 06, 2009


Hand #1
Poker Stars $3/$6 No Limit Hold’em – 2 players
The Official Hand History Converter

BTN/SB: $1059.50
Hero (BB): $600.00

Pre Flop: ($9.00) Hero is BB with 5 Diamond 5 Spade
BTN/SB raises to $18, Hero calls $12

Flop: ($36.00) J Heart 4 Spade 3 Club (2 players)
Hero checks, BTN/SB bets $24, Hero calls $24

Turn: ($84.00) 4 Club (2 players)
Hero checks, BTN/SB bets $60, Hero calls $60

River: ($204.00) 2 Club (2 players)
Hero checks, BTN/SB bets $174, Hero raises to $498 all in, BTN/SB folds

Final Pot: $552.00
Hero mucks 5 Diamond 5 Spade
Hero wins $551.50
(Rake: $0.50)

Hand #2
Poker Stars $3/$6 Pot Limit Omaha Hi – 2 players
The Official Hand History Converter

BTN/SB: $2252.85
Hero (BB): $699.00

Pre Flop: ($9.00) Hero is BB with 8 Heart 8 Diamond 9 Diamond 7 Diamond
BTN/SB raises to $18, Hero raises to $54, BTN/SB calls $36

Flop: ($108.00) 7 Spade 2 Heart J Spade (2 players)
Hero checks, BTN/SB checks

Turn: ($108.00) 3 Diamond (2 players)
Hero checks, BTN/SB bets $107.50, Hero calls $107.50

River: ($323.00) K Diamond (2 players)
Hero checks, BTN/SB bets $204, Hero raises to $537.50 all in, BTN/SB folds

Final Pot: $731.00
Hero mucks 8 Heart 8 Diamond 9 Diamond 7 Diamond
Hero wins $730.50
(Rake: $0.50)

View all 2 hands

Posted By danzasmack at 06:08 PM


September 02, 2009

Weird Day?

So I got up and did my pup walk and then just got rocked for around 45 minutes. The only action was HU PLO and AA no good to AK aipf. Whatever.

I took a few minutes, sat back down, got some HUNL action. I c/r’d a Ah7c3C with Qc9c and got called. Bing Ac turn. Nobody folds an ace in that spot and I’m bet/folding the turn to an unknown. So I bet big he calls. The river is a ten so I lose to AT and only AT here.

He had AT.

Now, vs. some better players I think I’m drawing dead on the turn sometimes, and maybe can’t b/f the turn but vs. unknowns I think stacking off there is not only standard, it’s +EV.

Like 5 hands later he revealed himself as an overaggro MSNL’er. I had not been 3-betting much, but he did decide to 4-bet call it off with 33. Someone the bottom-ish of my range (AKo) hit and I was on a comeback.

Got some 15/30 action @ LHE thereafter. The session was too long. I shouldn’t have played as long as I did. I got tired and I got sloppy. I played a horrible player for an extra 45 minutes for an extra $45.

Don’t look at the cashier. Don’t “play until the left numbers are 00” or something stupid. I know this, yet I let myself relearn it today. That’s the price you pay for getting a little rusty.

Too late now for me to play. I’m exhausted for some reason. I’ll be back to the tables tomorrow. Wish me luck!

Posted By danzasmack at 04:41 AM


August 31, 2009

Oh noes more poker!

Yeah more poker indeed. I got a little burnt out from too many donkaments and now getting back into putting in my daily hands.

Today was uneventful, a “reg fish” (basically this guy on FTP I have played like a dozen times, never for more than say 50 hands who will dump 10bb’s or hit and run me) hit and ran me flush to flush. NL action was good, I stacked 2 shortstackers but that’s about it. Short session but I think jumping into 3 or 4 hour sessions when you’re first getting back into it is bad.

I’ll definitely play again late, hopefully with a few hands interesting enough to post.

Posted By danzasmack at 07:14 PM


July 18, 2009

8 hour session.

If I knew how to hire a Craig’s List Escort I would right now just to have someone to talk to about this session. I have never been this mentally drained before in my entire life.

A little over a year ago I played Maciek Gracz for around 9 hours while he ran like god and made me want to stab a baby in the face. I eventually won and it’s all on video on a big hard drive i have. I don’t really plan on releasing it to DC or anything just a fun fact.

I just played that son of a bitch (please note I have NOTHING against him. He was very polite even when I started to chat tilt a little bit, soon after quitting) for several hours. He sat down with like $110 dollars. I had him all in or down to about 5-10 BBs I can’t tell you how many times. Then he would hit every fucking flop for like 35 hands in a row. It was the most disgusting thing I’ve ever seen. He ended up probably about 55 bets. It was insane.

At the same time I managed to find the absolute WORST HU player I’ve ever played against. A mythical “always check folds” player doesn’t exist IMO but this guy was close to it. In position? I cap and he bets flop and folds turn. I mean wow.

Of course I dumped about 10 BBs to him. Bad beat story #1 of the blog. I cap 7’s in position. We cap a T72r flop. Cap the 8d turn. I call the 9 river and get shown king jack.

Now that was only about 4 hours of the night. The rest of the night was basically the same shit with a different cast of yahoos. One guy, who shall remain nameless, is fucked. He really shouldn’t talk like he does in chat. He’s terrible and I intend to hack his Full Tilt account just to see how much he has in it so I know I need to know how much I have to talk off of him.

I’ll tell you what the most pathetic part is. I lost $1.50. Before HUHU, when I ran this bad, I would lose easily 200BBs. Easily. This was insane. Now, like a chubby man baby, I’m complaining about breaking even.

Just found out new Rhett Miller record is out so no more tilt for me.

Good night.

Posted By danzasmack at 10:40 AM


July 14, 2009

Why do I play them?

Donkament beats have been deleted. Don’t even know why I play them. I think I’m up like $8 on my past 5 which is awesome considering how horrible I ran. I’ll ship one for $30k soon. Was super deep in Sunday Million with a good chip stack and got it in on the turn with 88 vs. A6 on an 875A for a lot of chips. Neither of us had a spade for the 3 flush either. I can toss on like 6 more exit hands of that fashion.

Moral of the story is donkaments are a fun and easy way to help you get hands in. So that’s why I play them. They are fun and I would really love to win $30k or the $230k I was supposed to ship yesterday.

Won a small amount at cash overall today. The HU action I got was great, as was the 6max action. Despite getting 2 outed in 2 huge pots (back to back!) and whiffing in a 20BB pot with a monster draw I still pwnd noobs with vigor.

Issues with HEM and my windows partition have pooped on my sessions a bit. Hopefully I get that figured out in a bit because I much prefer it to my mac.


Posted By danzasmack at 03:34 AM


July 13, 2009

New Poker Enemy #1

Scott Fischman.

Early this morning my pup decides he has to take an epic piss and wakes me up. So I watch him pee as he stares back at me in that shameful “you’re really going to watch?” type of way. I couldn’t fall back asleep so I loaded up like 8 empties, including a “why not” 2/4 HA table (PLO and PLHE).

While reading the DC forums I get a notification that someone is ready to party with yours truly. What do you know, it’s Scott “little man” Fischman.

Anyway my pup then decides it’s time to poo so I’m pretty distracted. I misclick fold for like 3 hands, tank on a few pf min-raises, but get back into the swing of things pretty quickly. After a bit he’s up about $100 and I have not played well. Then I start playing normal speed. This is important because if I was taking forever I wouldn’t be pissed (because I could see you quitting someone who was playing very slowly).

Well then a few hands in I flop double gutted, bet and get called, hit the ass end bet and get called. The board pairs the river so I check and he bets and I call.

Insta sit-out quit.

!?!?! Seriously?

It ends up he was in a few SnG’s @ the same time but I don’t care – he insta-quit after hitting a river like he did? That’s a hit and run for sure. He didn’t even stack me. Not even close.

Even if something comes up and you have to quit (safe for say some sort of medical emergency which clearly wasn’t the case because he was in sng’s) – if it’s right after a big pot you at least say “sorry g2g”.

Quitting like he did was very rude. Fwiw I’m not even close to tilted.

So – poker enemy #1.

Posted By danzasmack at 03:22 PM


July 13, 2009


Seriously. Who decides to switch the “yes” and “no” buttons on your software after several years? You guys are idiots.

Posted By danzasmack at 02:06 PM


July 13, 2009

Small pots need bigger bluffs imo

Full Tilt Poker $15/$30 Limit Hold’em – 2 players
The Official Hand History Converter

Pre Flop: (1.667 SB) Hero is BB with 9 Heart 8 Spade
BTN/SB raises, Hero calls

Flop: (4 SB) T Spade A Club K Diamond (2 players)
Hero checks, BTN/SB checks

Turn: (2 BB) Q Diamond (2 players)
Hero checks, BTN/SB checks

River: (2 BB) T Heart (2 players)
Hero checks, BTN/SB bets, Hero raises, BTN/SB 3-bets, Hero caps!, BTN/SB folds

Final Pot: 8 BB
Hero wins 7.983 BB
(Rake: $0.50)

Posted By danzasmack at 07:49 AM


July 12, 2009

Back From the Future

Vegas was good. We ran the charity event about as smoothly as I thought we would. These TV Shows guys asked us to jump through hoops and I didn’t like them very much, so let’s hope they don’t make me look like a huge tool lol.

Just tournaments today, busted in a dumb way in 1 but am currently still in the Sunday Million. I don’t really think I’ve had a difficult decision yet though i did make 1 sick value bet with AA on a K86K9 with a flush on board. Going to see if I can squeak out a win because $230k would be nice.

Going to get back to grinding either late tonight (if I can’t sleep and all my work is done) or tomorrow some time. Been successful getting HULHE action lately which is good for me so let’s hope that keeps up. Not going to institute any sort of weekly hand quotient or anything – the best thing for getting in hands is taking out some “hobbies” you thought you liked and replacing them with poker. Video games is an easy one. Television when you don’t know what’s on. Just fire up some tables instead. I’ll usually sit @ something like HORSE or 8 game to start off because it gets my brain stimulated then sit on some empties and brace for pwnage.

See you guys in a bit.

Posted By danzasmack at 11:22 PM


July 07, 2009

No hands yet even though I'm in Vegas.

We have a big charity event coming up for DC and we’ve been swamped running around and planning for it. So no hands. Luckily I’ve talked Rob into making a video with me so I’ll get to play some.

I’m pretty pumped for “Dear Limidonk” – over-analyzing one hand is pretty much my specialty! Please ship us some interesting hands, even if it’s as simple as “what can I c/r the flop with?” in some spots!

Interesting hands to come!

Posted By danzasmack at 09:25 PM


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