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Hi Monoreticle,

I am very similar. Over the years I have picked up and dropped so many hobbies, interests and jobs than most folks could dream of. The way I have come to terms with it is by finally picking a few things that I get the most satisfaction from and concentrating on them. It took me many years to figure this out on my own. Wish I'd known about the book doc.lemon linked to!

Try to concentrate on improving your poker game rather than making money. If you improve, the money will follow.

If you are lazy a friend made notes
http://www.liquidpoker.net/blog/viewblog.php?id=956840

He also made notes on all 8 EPTE, great review for everyone.
http://www.liquidpoker.net/blog/viewblog.php?id=853534

Btw thanks a lot OP, you made me look up these gems and refresh the concepts

Sounds like you have way too big of expectations and too high of standards and when you don't reach them immediately you get frustrated and quit (either subconsciously or IRL). The problem with huge dreams like that is that they are not real...yet. Not saying they can never be, but try focusing on doing what you want for pure enjoyment and focus on improving without expectations and see how far it gets you after a while. Then you can calibrate to have realistic expectations and set actual achievable goals instead of living in a fantasy world.

It's great to dream big dreams but you have to realize that they are just dreams and not real in any way until you can begin to realistically bring them into reality by active involvement and hard work.

Just quit. If you ever find yourself at a place in your life when you have the mental side of things a bit more in check, you could always reconsider. If you do decide to quit you could probably find some way to make it really hard to get money online. Isn't there some exclude yourself from playing feature in most poker software?

I thought about quitting several times, but is seems that I keep coming back. And I keep coming back with the dream of making 1M, play good for few days, then go broke in 10 minutes. I self exclude myself several times, on some poker rooms until 2012.

Indeed I dream big. I quit the piano after learning very fast Fur Elise, because I though I am very good and started learning Chopin. Chopin needs probably years of practice until you play decent, so I just quit. As for guitar, I learned a lot several years, but then got to Jason Becker and Steve Vai. I tried a few months but it was to much, and instead of going back to the nice music I was playing, I quit.

It's probably the same with poker. If I dream about that million dollar, earning just 5$/day on 2NL is just peanuts. I do it for maximum one week, steady rate, but then I suddenly feel the need to double my bankroll in a day, or even cash 1st in a medium stake MTT. It's all in the Mastery book which I'm now reading, thanks again doc.lemon. You know the One Small step for man, on giant leap for man kind. I need the giant leap and i need it NOW.

Great guys, thanks, I will read and give it a real nice mental thought and come back with the result!

Threads 13 - Tolerance

Might also be very good if you are 'dreaming' of earning 1 mil. with poker. Maybe understanding variance might make you a bit more 'realistic'. There is a difference between goals and wishing. You are wishing you make a mil with poker, the reality is that you keep donating cash to the poker site while you should use proper bankroll management. A good goal for you might be: I am going to work on my bankroll management and I am going to play stakes my bankroll allows me to play.

Look up "smart" goals on google. Try to make some good goals that will work for you. Post them in this thread and let people tell you if they are good goals.

By the way, there are easier ways to earn a mil. then with poker

dont blame your inability for commitment and self-control based on amateur diagnoses on a pseudo-scientific-pop psychology-poker-video. and if you do want some psychological explanation, look into self-regulation, ego-depletion. not neuroticism. there is no cure, there is no medicine, no secret meditation that will make you a winner in life. if you give up and can't control your urges, what you need to do is start controlling them, one task at a time, its like a muscle, it needs to be trained and practiced, don't think there is a special supplement that will make it all better.

Well Hello again guys,

It's been a while, been some vacation time, also from work and from poker. Did a lot of reading about master's journey, self discipline, changing the human consciousness, setting and respecting goals.

This new me started poker with a bankroll of 50$ on 5NL (10 buyins , out of bankroll, but self agreed with that). What happened made me very happy. I played 5 days so far, starting 18th of August, and played 17k hands. Current bankroll: 150$, with 17 BB/100 in 17k hands. IT's not a long time at all, not a large sample size, and it's not a hot run (I lost every day 5 buyins, and come back a won 8 for example), but for the first time I am winning, am playing according to my plan for 5 days in a row. I have excluded myself from anything else than 5NL, and this daily win is making me very confident. So .. good news.

But there is also a problem. I am obsessed with playing. 17k in 5 days is quite high for me. I am multitabling 12 tables at a time, and doing it great. Timewise it's OK, I play about 2k hands in 2 hours.
When I find a little dead time (15min, 30min), all I can think about is just play a little poker. And I do it, I win, but at the end of the day most of my thoughts were directed to poker. Is it normal? Somebody has some advice of controlling also this part?

Thanks!

But there is also a problem. I am obsessed with playing. 17k in 5 days is quite high for me. I am multitabling 12 tables at a time, and doing it great. Timewise it's OK, I play about 2k hands in 2 hours.
When I find a little dead time (15min, 30min), all I can think about is just play a little poker. And I do it, I win, but at the end of the day most of my thoughts were directed to poker. Is it normal? Somebody has some advice of controlling also this part?

Wish I had that.

Do you have a girlfriend or someone this will really affect other than yourself?

I played over 30k hands last week, i am eager to move up to midstakes and that requires (from a normal person) a lot of time dedicated.

If you feel you are addicted and you dont like it, seek some help. If you make money from it and enjoy it...carry on imo. Poker needs a load of time put into it, seems you have the motivation.

Definitely buy and read this and you will get rid of your problem or at least find a way to work on it.
http://www.amazon.com/Mastery-Keys-Success-Long-Term-Fulfillment/dp/0452267560

Thanks for the reading suggestion, doc.lemon. I just finished reading "Mastery," and even though it was written almost 20 years ago (and has that "Japan knows a secret we don't" mentality of that time period with lots of references to Zen and Japanese martial arts), it distills everything else I've read in the past 3 years about talent and skill into a short, if not qualified, read.

I say it's not qualified since the author wants the reader to "surrender" (being one of the 5 master keys) and just believe this is how stuff really works then live his life according to it. The only real rationales given are Zen stories and personal anecdotes and even a nod to The Karate Kid. And there's also lots of pages given to personal essays on the ills of modern society. I don't agree or disagree with any of Mr. Leonard's conclusions, but it just drags in some spots and doesn't add (while possibly detracting) from the main message.

I've been fascinated by this genre of self-help since reading about "the 10,000 hour rule" in Malcolm Gladwell's "Outliers". Books like Daniel Coyle's "The Talent Code" and Matthew Syed's "Bounce" followed up in detail about what goes into these 10,000 hours using modern science and sports psychology to guide them. An honorable mention should also go to Carol Dweck's Mindset (published before Outliers) which simply tackles the core driver of talent, namely motivation or mindset.

Some skeptical people might not be willing to buy what "Mastery" is selling and might find one of the later (secular) books more to their taste. But all these books are basically re-telling the same story. It's really revealing to know that the method to mastery/talent is ages old and universal. We just have to apply it in our lives.

(Also, it's ironic that the people are making cliff's notes and making shortcuts to knowledge for a book that espouses learning for a lifetime and not looking for quick fixes.)

Hi Monoreticle,

I am very similar. Over the years I have picked up and dropped so many hobbies, interests and jobs than most folks could dream of. The way I have come to terms with it is by finally picking a few things that I get the most satisfaction from and concentrating on them. It took me many years to figure this out on my own. Wish I'd known about the book doc.lemon linked to!

Try to concentrate on improving your poker game rather than making money. If you improve, the money will follow.

same here in regards to everything.

Threads 13 - Tolerance

Might also be very good if you are 'dreaming' of earning 1 mil. with poker. Maybe understanding variance might make you a bit more 'realistic'. There is a difference between goals and wishing. You are wishing you make a mil with poker, the reality is that you keep donating cash to the poker site while you should use proper bankroll management. A good goal for you might be: I am going to work on my bankroll management and I am going to play stakes my bankroll allows me to play.

Look up "smart" goals on google. Try to make some good goals that will work for you. Post them in this thread and let people tell you if they are good goals.

By the way, there are easier ways to earn a mil. then with poker

+ 1 mirrion

Glad to hear you're winning and feel like you're playing well. Clearly, you're on a huge heater, so enjoy it. The heaters are an important part of any poker player's winrate, as they offset the negative variance that seems to happen all too often.

Without trying to be a downer, what is going to happen to your emotional state when you downswing (as you inevitably will)? You seem incredibly prone to tilt and to being results-oriented. Do you think your reading and reflecting has given you better tools to deal with your monkey tilt when it happens again? I only say this so you recognize again that the road you're on (to self-improvement) is a long one and, given your issues, you'll need to be really vigilant throughout. When you feel yourself tilting, you must quit and be able to put things into perspective. You will never have any prolonged success if you don't.

Sounds like things are going well. Make sure you maintain a balanced life and a logical perspective. Keep going and good luck.

Fur Elise is a pretty hard piece. Piano is like poker in that you need to be pay obsessive attention to tiny details over a long time to get really good. You can't play "very good" Fur Elise after just 3 months.