April 16, 2010

Son of the Morning

Who am I? It’s a deep question to post on a poker blog, but I think it’s important to think about this question. It’s not necessary to answer it, just to think about it. Recently I started delving deep in to the depths of myself, to figure out who I am.

Like most kids, I finished high school, and started college, or the Norwegian equivalent of it anyways. However, that wasn’t a pain free process. It was the most dreadful time of my life to date. Ever since I was a kid, I have had an uncanny ability to pick up on things and learn it. So much so, that the Norwegian school system has held me back. I could probably have finished a master’s degree by the age of 18 if the school system was tailored to me… but it’s not. What can I do about it? Absolutely nothing. The one thing I can not do is sit here and feel fucking miserable about the Norwegian school system, and blame them for my apparent lethargy. It isn’t really their fault, nor is it mine. It’s not anyone’s fault. It’s an “unfortunate chain of events” that caused me to become smarter than the average person, yet being the rabbit racing the turtle. I used to dwell on this, but no more. Like a superhero, I’ll use my powers for good!

Using his powers for good.

I came across this new view on life after having gotten into “the art of pickup”. This sounds like a complete cheesefest, and I have to admit that it is. I’m not going to go into detail about pickup, but I’ll go as far as to saying it’s the sickest thing that has happened in my life since I started playing guitar at age 15. However, these guys who are into pickup, they’re also very much into improving as a man and improving the quality of your life, because after all, what generates attraction is who you are – not what you say. This is where I found out about things like self-realization, the ego and the likes. I recently read the book “The Power of Now” by Eckhart Tolle, I re-read Tao Te Ching and I re-watched movies like Matrix and Fight Club, and I was literally blown away by these books and movies. All these things are central to my new set of beliefs, my new view on life in general.

I have become aware of self-realization. I want to become the best I can be in all my endeavors. It sounds massive task, and it probably is. It takes hard work and dedication. A well-known pickup instructor said that in order to become good with women, you need three things. You need discipline, training and execution. I am ready to put in the work; I just have to detail the fields in which I want to put in said work. If you haven’t figured it out by now, I’m quitting school. See my previous blog post for some more detail. The plan is to quit school, play poker for about 6 – 7 months, and move to Barcelona in 2011 and live as a professional poker player. Sounds like a pretty sweet plan, yeah? I agree. How does this fit in with self-realization, which was what I started this paragraph with?

Pretty sweet plan.

The Merriam Webster’s dictionary defines self-realization as “fulfillment by oneself of the possibilities of one’s character or personality”. It sounds massive, I know, but there’s even more! Abraham Maslow, famous for the Hierarchy of Needs, also wrote extensively about self-realization. He defined the term as “the impulse to convert oneself into what one is capable of being”. And to finish it off, I’ll quote Wikipedia: “Based on Maslow, the most common meaning given to self-realization is that of psychological growth and maturation. It represents the awakening and manifestation of latent potentialities of the human being – for example, ethical, esthetic, and religious experiences and activities.”

Self-realization, to me, means becoming the best I can be at everything I do. That’s because I am a perfectionist at heart. In the heat of battle, I do not settle for second. I am a fucking winner, and to be completely fulfilled, I have to reach my maximum potential in each and every one of my endeavors. I’m not really a dabbler; I am more of a committer. If something catches my interest, I absorb everything I find about it like a sponge. I become almost obsessed by it, and I have a strong feeling that a lot of you who are reading this are the same as me. Very rarely do I dabble in something on the surface, and I mostly end up digging deeper and deeper.

Jessica Alba also likes to dig deep.

So with this in mind, I’ll end up answering my original question. Not the “who am I?” question, because I can’t answer that now. I’m 21 years old, how can I possibly know? No, the question I can answer now is rather “What do I want with my life?”

I want freedom to do what I want. I want to learn a multitude of languages. I want to experience a multitude of cultures. I want good memories. I want to be able to look back at my life and not have it flash before my eyes. I want to be able to get some popcorn, lay back on my deathbed and enjoy the fucking movie. Oh yeah, and I want to update this blog more often!


Posted By ohjoy at 09:48 AM



aRT- posted on April 20, 2010 at 09:43 AM


This is funny because I just found this blog totally at random. I registered a few days ago in order to watch Tommy Angelo's series first episode. Then here I am this morning bored like hell in front of my computer at my internship, searching for something to read.
I was stunned when I read this because it is almost an exact description of myself:
0/Obv you play poker like me :p
1/The thing about the school system being too slow: I've thought the same for a long time
2/The art of pickup: I've discovered it a few months ago, really interesting since its not only about chatting up some chicks but about self-realization, breaking one's fake limitations, etc.
3/You say you have recently read The Power of Now. I am actually currently reading it! Nice timing. I think this book is pure gold.
4/You play guitar too. And now that you read the Eckart Tolle's book, I guess you understand better how playing music is the nuts for enjoying the present moment! :p
5/I am asking some serious questions about the lifestyle I would like because I know I won't work 9 to 5 for the next 40 years! So I have to find something!

Also, what is "Tao Te Ching"? And do you know Boywonder? :p And you shouldnt quit school yet these are some wonderful years! Just cut class :p

To conclude, very nice post :) PM me if you want to discuss further aspects

ohjoy posted on April 20, 2010 at 10:19 AM


Tao te Ching is the main book for the teachings of taoism. Check it out on Wikipedia. I don't know Boywonder personally, although I do know of him and his results. Impressive stuff.


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