The upward dig out of a deep hole

Real strange, because my previous account had a ROI of 25% over 500 games. This account is doomswitched...

 

It's been a week from my lowest point in life so far (minus family issues), and I think I've got it together a bit. Working harder on my profession, have a new film job coming up soon hopefully, should be worth a few thousand to me at least.

This is just a quick post. Deep in the 28k Guarantee on FT, sitting 28th out of 346 left (starting 1048). Wish me luck to take it down!

Stumbled and now sitting mid field just below average stack. Uphill battle to come, less than 100 left till ITM but I want that #1 spot!

Update: 20 off the money, only have 10bb's, shove or fold. Lets hope I can at least cash since I got dominated deep in this tournament :(

Update: Made it ITM. Just doubled up 66 vs AKo, now sitting a few k under average. Back in it baby!

Update: Out in 60th for $57, my 66's didn't hold up this time :( chase a dream another day!

Ok so later today, I admit I had a really, REALLY spewy session. Spewy to the point I was down 7 BI's at 25nl. And I did the worst possible thing. After playing for a LONG time and only gaining 1 BI back, then losing it to some bad beat, I moved up levels to 1/2 (where I used to play back in the day) and said to myself "ok you see how you go with $200". This brings me back to the old days where I used to tilt so hard i'd move up and lose more. I swear I'll have to implement some stop losses on tilty sessions so I don't do this again. In saying that I got lucky and got most of my losses back. I'm not happy with myself, bringing myself back down to where I was last week.

I was going to write more meaningful post about the reading and research I had been doing, but this tilty afternoon just threw me out and consumed all my time. Gah, poker can be a cruel game...

BR: $940. Aiming for $1k by the weekend -> Still have yet to try out SNG's again. I think cash is wayy too much variance for my style of play at the moment...

Had a really swingy day today at 25nl! It was definitely a reminder why you shouldn't play when not 100% focused AND why you shouldn't play while frustrated at external issues. I was having some trouble setting up some things on my computer while 2 tabling, and I was getting really frustrated, and I found myself taking it out on the poker table. There was one point where this player 3bet me preflop 3 times in a matter of 6 hands and I spew shoved back with AT out of frustration, of course he flipped over AK and took it down.

Reflecting back on "The Poker Mindset" by Matthew Hilger and Ian Taylor, tells you that every hand is a new hand, the outcome from the previous hand has no bearing on the next hand. That the goal of poker is to make the correct decisions and not to let any external frustrations influence the correct decision making process. I clearly didn't do that today and found myself playing an extra long session to make up for my mistakes. I realised why I was tilting, that I was tilting (which is a big thing) and slammed closed HEM and FT after losing just over 1.5 BI (losing about 3 from my max point). Actually opened up photoshop and did some painting, which definitely calmed me down a bit. I managed to get what I was trying to do working, ate some dinner, and sat back down to grind some more. I was still making spazzy plays, calling down way too light, opening too wide in some spots - somewhat experimenting with SSNL Disease comments mentioned. I just need to keep in mind his videos are focused on shorthand ring games, not full ring.

While I'm talking about full ring games, they seem to have stabialized my spewyness a little. I still spew at times, but the close to low point on my graph was the end of shorthanded, and the start of full ring, and clearly it's been a better decision to be working a more patient game. HEM tells me I'm 7BB/100 for 25nl full ring over 1800 hands - still a small sample but I've never really been consistent at a limit before. I slowly see changes in my patience, gameplay and thought process. I made some clever bluffs today on scary boards for opponents. There weren't really any spots I missed the bluff on when I thought about it, if I did a snap bluff without thinking, thats where I lost some money.

Haven't played any SNG's for a while, will definitely give them another shot soon. Tried one $20 entry turbo cashout today, got busted JJ vs 44 flopped set. It happens, have to be hyper aggressive in those turbos to get places, just bad luck I ran into a lower set. Anyway here's the swingy graph today. Will most likely post some more thoughtful posts in my blog in the next few days. Ciao!

Garf:

 

I'm still starting day 5, just one of my very first hands was this.
Wouldn't mind feedback on the way I played it. I had 0 reads on the
player as I just joined, but I wanted to give him a chance to think he
had me and was ahead. Either way, rip me to shreds or praise (see bottom of post):

UPDATE:
I'm finally break even from when I started cash games 4 days ago - after that spew session. Feels good, I put in winning days yesterday and today of 200 hand sessions. Quite small sample, but I can't really commit to doing a few thousand in a day. 

And I just wanted to add - I've been watching Terp's SSNL Disease series and I highly recommend it! I've already learnt so much about board texture, bluffing ranges, opening up my range in late position etc. Seems to be helping me out. Thanks Terp!

DAY 4:

DAY 5:

 

OVERALL:

 

I'm still down on the 6max SNG's which I'll swap back to $5's instead of $10's, and see how I run. Hopefully I can get some consistency back in that game. No tourneys for today as I was working during the day.

BR currently: $960

Onto those hands I wanted feedback on:

Full Tilt Poker $0.10/$0.25 No Limit Hold'em - 8 players - View hand 710789
The Official DeucesCracked.com Hand History Converter

SB: $28.18
Hero (BB): $25.00
UTG: $34.14
UTG+1: $28.29
MP1: $27.41
MP2: $8.50
CO: $15.29
BTN: $24.41

Pre Flop: ($0.35) Hero is BB with A A
UTG calls $0.25, 2 folds, MP2 calls $0.25, 2 folds, SB calls $0.15, Hero raises to $1.25, UTG calls $1, 1 fold, SB calls $1

Flop: ($4.00) Q 4 T (3 players)
SB checks, Hero bets $3.25, UTG calls $3.25, SB folds

Turn: ($10.50) 2 (2 players)
Hero checks, UTG bets $4.25, Hero raises to $10.25, UTG calls $6

River: ($31.00) 6 (2 players)
Hero bets $10.25 all in, UTG calls $10.25

Final Pot: $51.50
Results TBA if you want them.

AND another questionable hand I would like feedback on. No real reads as I only have 13 hands on villain. Stats 43/31 but doesn't say anything about post flop play:

Full Tilt Poker $0.10/$0.25 No Limit Hold'em - 8 players - View hand 710793
The Official DeucesCracked.com Hand History Converter

BB: $22.67
UTG: $25.10
UTG+1: $25.25
MP1: $30.28
MP2: $25.00
CO: $24.37
Hero (BTN): $26.19
SB: $24.84

Pre Flop: ($0.35) Hero is BTN with K Q
4 folds, CO raises to $0.50, Hero calls $0.50, 1 fold, BB calls $0.25

Flop: ($1.60) K 9 T (3 players)
BB checks, CO bets $0.50, Hero raises to $1.75, BB folds, CO calls $1.25

Turn: ($5.10) 5 (2 players)
CO checks, Hero bets $2.50, CO raises to $22.12 all in, Hero requests TIME, Hero ?

Having a frustrating day today of bad luck playing 6max SNG's. It seemed every time I put my chips in ahead, I'd get sucked out on. I've only just started and its happened so many times...

Out of 4 SNG's:

Full Tilt Poker $10 + $1 No Limit Hold'em Tournament - t60/t120 Blinds - 3 players - View hand 709209
The Official DeucesCracked.com Hand History Converter

SB: t790 M = 4.39
Hero (BB): t3395 M = 18.86
BTN: t4815 M = 26.75

Pre Flop: (t180) Hero is BB with A T
1 fold, SB raises to t790 all in, Hero calls t670

Flop: (t1580) 5 Q K

Turn: (t1580) 9

River: (t1580) Q

Final Pot: t1580
SB shows 9 A (two pair, Queens and Nines)
Hero shows A T (a pair of Queens)
SB wins t1580

Full Tilt Poker $10 + $1 No Limit Hold'em Tournament - t100/t200 Blinds - 3 players - View hand 709210
The Official DeucesCracked.com Hand History Converter

SB: t1120 M = 3.73
Hero (BB): t4445 M = 14.82
BTN: t3435 M = 11.45

Pre Flop: (t300) Hero is BB with J A
1 fold, SB raises to t1120 all in, Hero calls t920

Flop: (t2240) T 2 T

Turn: (t2240) T

River: (t2240) K

Final Pot: t2240
SB shows K J (a full house, Tens full of Kings)
Hero shows J A (three of a kind, Tens)
SB wins t2240

Full Tilt Poker $10 + $1 No Limit Hold'em Tournament - t100/t200 Blinds - 3 players - View hand 709211
The Official DeucesCracked.com Hand History Converter

SB: t2015 M = 6.72
Hero (BB): t3600 M = 12
BTN: t3385 M = 11.28

Pre Flop: (t300) Hero is BB with A 6
1 fold, SB raises to t2015 all in, Hero calls t1815

Flop: (t4030) 6 K 5

Turn: (t4030) 9

River: (t4030) 4

Final Pot: t4030
SB shows K 2 (a pair of Kings)
Hero shows A 6 (a pair of Sixes)
SB wins t4030

(I know this one is pretty standard, he was shoving any cards as shown)

Full Tilt Poker $10 + $1 No Limit Hold'em Tournament -
t120/t240 Blinds - 3 players - View hand 709213
The Official DeucesCracked.com
Hand History Converter

SB: t4190 M = 11.64
Hero (BB): t1125 M = 3.12
BTN: t3685 M = 10.24

Pre Flop: (t360) Hero is BB with 6 A
1 fold, SB raises to t4190 all in, Hero calls t885 all in

Flop: (t2250) Q 6 5

Turn: (t2250) 8

River: (t2250) T

Final Pot: t2250
SB shows T 3 (a pair of Tens)
Hero shows 6 A
(a pair of Sixes)
SB wins t2250

Thats the end of just 1 SNG. Others:

Full Tilt Poker $10 + $1 No Limit Hold'em Tournament - t25/t50
Blinds - 6 players - View hand 709214
The
Official DeucesCracked.com
Hand History Converter

MP:
t645 M = 8.60
CO: t2105 M = 28.07
BTN: t2440 M = 32.53
SB:
t465 M = 6.20
BB: t2110 M = 28.13
Hero
(UTG): t1235 M = 16.47

Pre Flop:
(t75) Hero is UTG with A J
Hero raises to t150,
1 fold, CO calls t150, 1 fold, SB calls t125, 1 fold

Flop:
(t500) 6 A J (3 players)
SB
bets t315 all in, Hero calls t315, CO folds

Turn:
(t1130) Q (2 players - 1 is all in)

River:
(t1130) 5 (2 players - 1 is all in)

Final
Pot: t1130
SB shows 7 8
(a flush, Queen high)
Hero shows A J (two pair, Aces and Jacks)
SB wins t1130

 Full Tilt Poker $10 + $1 No Limit Hold'em Tournament -
t50/t100 Blinds - 4 players - View hand 709215
The
Official DeucesCracked.com
Hand History Converter

BB:
t2320 M = 15.47
CO: t2985 M = 19.90
BTN: t1230 M =
8.20
Hero (SB): t2465 M = 16.43

Pre
Flop: (t150) Hero is SB with K K
CO raises to t200, BTN raises to t1230 all in, Hero calls
t1180, 1 fold, CO calls t1030

Flop:
(t3790) 5 9 2
(3 players - 1 is all in)
Hero bets t1235 all in, CO folds

Turn:
(t3790) 7 (2 players - 2 are all in)

River:
(t3790) T (2 players - 2 are all in)

Final
Pot: t3790
BTN shows 6 6
(a flush, Ten high)
Hero shows K K (a pair of Kings)
BTN wins t3790
 
 
Bit brutal for 4 SNG's only. It happens though...
Back to the grind

UPDATE: On better news, 21st in Turbo Fiddy. Third time in a week. Still yet to get #1 so that will be my goal. Getting there though!

Decided to play one final hurrah before bed. I registered for the 3k Guarantee cashout tourney on FT. Was a long slog and was bouncing up and down in chip levels as there was some maniac players on my table for the majority of the tournament. Was quite fun, and I wasn't worried too much about the slow play of the non turbo tournament either...

Played quite well, took HEAPS of notes on players, how they played, at most stages I had notes on every person I was sitting with. Nearly bubbled as my chipstack was getting really short. I have to work on chipping up in the late stages so I don't have to worry about the bubble, and I can be the bubble bully. Anyway, got past that and got ITM. Cashouts are a real strange dynamic, as you never know when to cash out. Since I was relatively short throughout the tournament, I didn't get to cash out any chips 'I didn't need'. One point I went on a run and chipped up fast (6k to 30k in 10 odd hands) and was just about to cash out my BI until I got involved in a hand which dented my stack back down to 20k, so decided against cashing out the 8k chips I was going to.

Either way, I made the final table a little short stacked and got a $81.19 cashout bonus, wouldve liked to have entered with more chips but can't complain either way! Busted out in 6th for $150, so a total of $231.19 from $11 BI. I think I should stick to MTT's they seem to be paying off for me, I'm preferring FT over Stars - I swear stars gave me so many bad beats its incredible.

It's 3:20am so I think I'll head to bed now.

BR: Back up to $885! (from a demorilizing 6 max and 25nl session, I'd have 1k if I didn't play these but it happens!).

Update: I decided not to give up on 25nl just yet (as I tried out 10nl and it was like pulling teeth), so I gave it another go this morning. Once again session started off as a losing session. I was only 2 tabling but playing 6max ring was going too fast for my liking and I found myself playing sub-optimal hands and check folding on missed flops, and when I was aggressive I found myself running into made hands. 

I decided to swap to full rung to see the difference. I felt much more comfortable and could 4 table and still watch what was going on. I rarely play full ring and it seemed to work for me. I could tighten up my range and not be having a negative redline to worry about, but also, not worry so much when I do get involved in a pot because I usually had the best hand. Graph for 3 days including epic runbad.

 

Well nothing really major to brag about because it was just a mincash this time. But cashed in the Turbo Fiddy again, 45 places paid out of a field of 400, came 8th 2 days ago and just got 32nd. I'm starting to like these turbo tournaments, as I seem to run good at flips. The cash netted me $80, minus BI and rake, its a profit of $25. Not much but its a start with getting this tournament practice in.

I'll most likely play some 6max SNG's and 25nl tonight to mix it up a bit. For now I'll do some work to earn some real money and revisit it later in the night. I'll leave you with a bubble hand, 47 runners left and 45 places paid. I wanted to put some pressure on once it folded to me, don't you hate it when this happens! Here it is:

Full Tilt Poker Turbo Fiddy No Limit Hold'em Tournament - t800/t1600 Blinds + t200 - 8 players - View hand 706608
The Official DeucesCracked.com Hand History Converter

UTG: t23642 M = 5.91
UTG+1: t22714 M = 5.68
MP1: t8020 M = 2.00
MP2: t7945 M = 1.99
CO: t9625 M = 2.41
BTN: t14502 M = 3.63
Hero (SB): t10011 M = 2.50
BB: t8518 M = 2.13

Pre Flop: (t4000) Hero is SB with 2 6
6 folds, Hero raises to t9811 all in, BB calls t6718 all in

Flop: (t18236) 3 3 Q

Turn: (t18236) 2

River: (t18236) 8

Final Pot: t18236
Hero shows 2 6 (two pair, Threes and Twos)
BB shows A A (two pair, Aces and Threes)
BB wins t18236

EDIT:

Played some 25nl, played about the same length of time - 90 minutes. Played TERRIBAD. Down 5 BI. I called it quits, although I was making tilting calls around 200 hands in the session so I closed all tables, went off, did the dishes, grabbed a beer and tried again. At this stage I was down 4 BI, played pretty much break even for 275 hands and then the variance train arrived and I dropped another few BI's below EV after some opponents sucked out on me. EV: -$84, Real: -$126. My bankroll was crushed so I'll most likely go back to SNG's and if I try out ring, I'll most likely step down to 10nl. Just too shakey for me at the moment with the cash games...

EDIT EDIT: 

Did my 6max sessions, and I'm definitely doomswitched today, running around 5 BI below EV from final AI busto, not to mention the amount of times I got outdrawn when I put my chips in ahead. My BR got even more bruised so its back down to $5 6 max SNG's. I shouldn't have stepped up so early. I'm not playing with scared money but a downward swingy day like this does hurt. Won't give up!

Oh, and on FT, every time someone asks me for a chop on the final HU, I always decline and lose?? Whats up with that. Every other time I come out on top -_- Its like they're mental doomswitching me...

Ok so I spent some time at a friends place last night… after ranting my frustrations at life, I think I’m ready to start rebuilding. Spent the morning doing some things I’d been putting off for ages – setting up my business properly (I do multimedia design/3D animation so if anyone is interested in offering me work, send me a message). Lots more to do but its a start.

Yesterday on one of my toughest days, I gave the Turbo Fiddy a go on FT, ended up final tabling but busting in 8th for like $500. Not a bad BR buffer but first place was much higher, and I played it poorly I must admit. I was middle stacked, and on the button with A8, shipped my stack to try and run over the blinds, and BB tanked, and called with A9 with equal stack sizes (would’ve left him with around 2k chips if he lost!). Course a 9 was on the flop which ended my run.

I was dissapointed with the play because I think a simple 3 or 4 bet would have done the job if he didn’t hold A9, and I could have released the hand on the flop or had more bluff control. But hey, it happens. Should’ve got the proper HH and posted it. It happens…

So i’ve been grinding out $5 6 max SNG over the past few weeks and had a 25% ROI over 400ish games. I think 6 max SNG’s are my grinding point instead of ring games because I seem to have a less spewy tendancy when I know its win or bust. I haven’t played much today but due to my increase on BR, I decided to give the $10 6 max’s a go. Played only 6 (6 tabling, I can play more but not as profitably, I tend to miss reads if I play more), and cashed 1st in 3 and 2nd in 1. So I definitely think they are beatable (I know sample size is non existant, but can’t be much harder than $5??).

I will stick at this new limit until I either drop to 100 BI on $5’s ($500), or pump $10’s up to 200 BI’s ($2000). My plan is to have a 50 BI drop down level and a 200 BI step up level. I think this would be the best BRM I can think of right now. That way I’m stepping up at 150BI of the next level. It’s very conservative but I’m not really in the mindset of going busto at the moment! (disclaimer: this is obviously dependant on stages and steps, $5, $10, $20, $30 etc, so rough estimations).

I’ll leave it at that, hopefully will do some more grinding later today. So currently my BR is at: $800…

EDIT

Tried to play some 25nl, played for an hr and a 1/2 mainly 2 tableing, trying to table select 6max games with the highest players/flop % in the FT lobby. Also kept an eye out for shortstack players. I used my HEM HUD (This is rare for me, honestly) to keep an eye out for those high VPIP and low PFR players. When they busted or left, I left the table. Started off quite aggressive, and hit a few snags hence the downswing. At the bottom, I started making sure I was playing the fish more and climbed back up. Only a small sample but I’m done with poker for tonight…

Feel free to comment on this strange hand. I was thinking after I put out that feeler bet that someone would have a higher Kx combo, then I thought possibly flush draw? Ace sealed the fold on the river, should I have double barreled?

Full Tilt Poker $0.10/$0.25 No Limit Hold’em – 6 players
The Official DeucesCracked.com Hand History Converter

UTG: $17.50
MP: $36.37
CO: $20.00
Hero (BTN): $33.74
SB: $38.23
BB: $36.45

Pre Flop: ($0.35) Hero is BTN with K 8
UTG raises to $0.85, MP calls $0.85, 1 fold, Hero calls $0.85, 2 folds

Flop: ($2.90) K 6 3 (3 players)
UTG checks, MP checks, Hero bets $1.75, UTG calls $1.75, MP calls $1.75

Turn: ($8.15) 5 (3 players)
UTG bets $2, MP calls $2, Hero calls $2

River: ($14.15) A (3 players)
UTG bets $6, MP calls $6, Hero folds

Final Pot: $26.15
UTG shows T A (a pair of Aces)
MP shows A Q (a pair of Aces)
MP wins $24.85
(Rake: $1.30)

BR: $812 (rounded to nearest 100 before was really around $787)

Garfs:

Ok so I’ve been playing poker for maybe a year seriously, late in 2009 I had a massive heater on Full Tilt somehow managing to run $50 up to $17k in 2 weeks (obviously using very poor bankroll management). Some of you would think “wow that’s great! Good work!”. If anything, its the worst thing that happened to me. This is why.

The Origins

To start i’ll take you to my poker origins. I had been playing on facebook poker (lol I know rite!) and I had been doing quite well, I had shifted to Full Tilt when a friend told me he played freerolls there and could win actual money! I thought cool, why not. I started playing a freeroll a day, and doing somewhat ok. I bubbled a couple of times, but never cashed. One evening I thought “hell why not deposit $50 and see what I can do, its only $50” and although quite hessitant about putting that money in, I did. This was a big step for me, even though it was only $50 and I had a good job, there was an excitement of putting money into online poker which surprised me.

I played some micro ring games, and made a small bit, but also lost a small bit. I played some micro SNG’s and won/lost – pretty much break even. A few days after dabbling in it, I played a 0.50c rebuy for the fun of it. I managed to come in 2nd place with only an addon used (so essentially in it for $1) and cashed $200!!! Being quite conservative with my money, I played a bit more and after losing some, I cashed out $100 and felt quite happy with that and donked away the rest of the $$ taking shots. This was the start of the downfall.

The Poker Bug

After the small cash and I withdrew my money, I felt bored a few days later, and inevitably deposited again. This was the start of a bad thing. I played more, and I lost more. Each $50 deposit lost hurt, so it was done sparingly. Maybe once a fortnight or so. I was a losing player, but this wasn’t the bad part, the money seemed to stretch out and provide me with enough entertainment hours that it didn’t bother me. I saw it as paying for entertainment which went for hours. This went on but got increasingly more common. I found myself depositing while working (I work from home), and taking $50 shots at HU once in a while. It was a real rush, but it was losing money and becoming a problem. That leads me to the heater stage

On Fire BABY!

At that stage I wasn’t really educated on much of the serious poker theories, I started reading ’The Theory of Poker" by David Sklansky since I was getting into it a little more, and my results suddenly skyrocketed (the start of the heater). After reading around 50 pages of the book, I got home one night after a night out drinking and thought “the book told me the only way to learn is by playing, so why not have a go”. That night while slightly drunk, I deposited $50, split it 2 ways on NL50 tables, and went for it. After a few hours, I amazingly managed to turn that $50 into $400ish (I may have stepped up to NL100, cant remember). I went to bed a really happy man. Having seen this success, I proceeded to play poker in the morning instead of working and ran it up a little more.
Over the next week, I kept playing aggressively and making money, by the same day next week I had turned that $50 into $5k. I was amazed. By this time I was playing NL200 and taking shots at NL600. I continued into the next week with the aim of making at least 1k a day, and I did just that. Just 2 weeks later from the initial deposit, I had $17k in my account with my # of hands played most likely quite low. I was ecstatic! I had made a goal of $20k to withdraw – the initial $5k would have paid off my gambling debts (this is how large it had grown) and I had considered withdrawing it. But I read that you needed money to make money so I left it in there…

The problem Begins…

I was doing really well, I had a goal/target financially, and I thought I was invincible. This was not the case. On the friday of my highest $$$ peak, I got bad beat at NL600 tables twice with AA preflop. At this time I knew what tilt was, but I didn’t know how to control it. I went on tilt, I went on tilt the worst way possible, and I will never forget myself for it. At this time I had desensitised myself to the amounts of money I was playing with… I stepped up limits to chase losses, and got bad beat again. I kept stepping up until I got involved in a pot at like 25/50 with $4k at the table, it was me with a weak full house, vs quads for an 8K pot. I was stunned… swearing to myself and had little money left. I started playing any and every hand possible, and losing money at an alarming rate until it was all gone…

I was amazed, hating myself, and justifying it by thinking “it was only really $50… the rest wasn’t my money… I am really good but have had a day of bad luck…”

The Downward Slope

Thinking I was actually a good player, and also having been desensitised to money, I started depositing at high levels, higher than I would have normally. I kept losing, and losing, and losing. Until I had depleted a large chunk of my savings in the process. I moved out of home, and purchased some equipment for my business to spend the money before poker got to it. Then my amount of work had shrunk to a level where I wasn’t earning much money. By then the poker monster had taken over and I couldn’t stop depositing and tilting away money. Tilt tilt tilt…

Current Situation

Currently, I am short on work, have large credit card debts thanks to poker. I have recently learnt about the fact I need to find a new place to rent, also need to find a more secure job. Life is probably the worst its been, but i’m not going to have a cry about it because I know I am skilled (profession wise, not poker wise), I know I can find other work and I’m not going to give up that easily. I have since learnt a fair bit about poker, I will keep grinding out my $700 roll on FT while looking for other work and a house. I have realised poker, although has its highs and lows, can be really dangerous on unstable minds.

So here is the blog, where the grind will begin, or end, based on the next couple of weeks. I am not looking for sympathy, just needed to verbalize my story. I am a DEGEN, and I have learnt a lot (i hope) on what not to do…