Wave of Mutilation

I played my first session back at midstakes a bit ago. I broke even but I feel good about it. I was tighter than I could have been but I didn't want to run out there all willy nilly. I had planned on playing some 5/10 and recording it but the games have been super dead the last few days at least. Seems like every time I check out the lobby the only thing running are these cocksucker shortstack tables. FUCK THAT. 

So Billy Corgan is crazy. I mean I knew he was insane already, but this shit takes the cake. When he was trying to find a drummer for the current incarnation of his Smashing Pumpkins he had the chance to recruit System of a Down's drummer. He denied him for a 16 year old kid. That's just ludicrous. I mean, I'll bet the kid can play but come the fuck on, when I think about the beauty that could be heavy old school pumpkins + system of a down's drummer wailin' away where Heroin Chamberlain used to, ohhhhhh man. If a keyboardist died in that line-up it would be because his ear drums got exploded by machine gunning drums. If the dude from SOAD came to me and was all, "Hey I'd like to try out for your band" My response would be....

Get it? Simple. Don't fuck it up next time Corgan. Or pizza's going to send out.... FOR YOU!

Someone asked me the other day how I write such awesome blog posts. I thanked them for their compliment and told them that I just write when I'm feeling inspired or passionate about something. If you don't have any passion behind your creativity then you're a fucking robot. A god damn grade A Milliken. A scarecrow. Now that doesn't entirely translate to poker since you can find games easy enough to play like a retard and still make out like the hamburgler but I do feel like you need passion to play your best and achieve tough goals. My problem has always been that passion is fleeting. I love poker, don't get me wrong, I'll be on my death bed tryin' to stack some priest reading me my rights, errrr my death prayer thingies or whatever they do, walkin' through the river in the shadow of my equities death etc. etc. but my desire to play a lot washes in and out like the ocean tide. I used to want to force myself to play a ton but I don't really want to anymore. I'd be a miserable fuck. I'm happy being a jovial miserable fuck thank you very much. 

I guess what I'm trying to say is, just like everything else in life you need to flesh out what you want for yourself, what your priorities are, what matters to you. You need to go through all kinds of experiences to figure it out. That's why I think people that get married and have kids and jump into this cookie cutter life at like 18-20 are dumb. No offense if that's you and you're reading this but come on dude seriously. It's time to wake up and don't you wish you were smelling something other than the diaper buffet? Oh yeah, I thought so. 

I don't even know where I'm going with this honestly, just kinda inspired to yammer on about it for some reason. Do what you want to do in your life. It's YOUR life. Don't let your parents hold you back, don't let randoms influence you and hold you back, don't let your fucking friends hold you back because they wouldn't do what you want to do, and most of all don't think you're stuck with this cookie cutter existence and have to be a cog in the governments wheel of shit because that's "what you're supposed to do." FUCK that. I would jump out of this screen if I could right now and put a giant red bingo hall inked stamp that said FUCK THAT on each and every one of your faces, so you could think about this a lot in the future :D Or just get laughed at in public I guess. 

My childhood had it's ups and downs for sure, and I could go on with infinite crazy stories that would amuse you, make you want to cry, and plain old shock the hell out of you, and through all the heartache and the madness I've refused to give up, and stop believing that I could accomplish whatever goals or desires I had. I've gone through all the periods of blaming others and myself, but the reality is the past is the past, it built you the way you are today for a reason, you are the organic machine constructed by the experiences in your life, and that's what makes us all so special.

I guess I'm done for now, can't promise I won't follow this up tonight or tomorrow or even in an hour, I guess that's what blogs are for though no? 

Oh and David Lynch is one suave fucker....