le petite tilt.

have you seen californication? about the guy that attracts all kinda sluts for a night just by appearing? yeah that one. but (why but? lol) mr moody said something that stick to my mind. it was sth like "i have a noble mind, but my actions are poor". i digged that, homeboys n gals. it really is like that! even though my actions are not like hank's, whoring around, making love to my daughters best friend or sth. it is more like my actions not relying on what i believe in, or what is healthy to me. there is no responsibility for my actions whatsoever. i just try to avoid things, which turns out to limit my personal as well as skill developement, because my actions are not based on being "+ev", YEAH POKERSLANG YEAH,.... but on .. no idea. poor life. poor poor life.

so how do my fears interfere with my actions? what do i fear, what do i avoid and how do i get over that? well once i find out what i am avoiding, why and bla... i should most likely just push myself doing it. GG, PROFIT, ROLEX.

after i wrote this i went afk for a bit and thought that i didnt take myself seriously. nor do i take others seriously (suicidal in poker <3) and kinda offend them by not doing so. but that is just the turnout of my avoiding behaviour and such. at least im funny. funny 

and loosing in poker.