lol donkaments

Hi!

So I've decided to jump on the band wagon and start a pokerblog myself. Though I've never been a person to read blogs nor find them interesting I have started reading a few pokerblogs lately and have, to my surprise, really enjoyed the format and what it does both for readers and bloggers themselves.
 
First things first: I'm a 22 year-old living in Stockholm, Sweden, studying for a "Degree of Master of Science in Business and Economics" (i know, lah dih dah). I have played poker since late january 2010 starting at €4nl and managed to move up to €20nl in the beginning of May. At that point I took 1½months break from poker due to exams and when I came back I hit a wall basically. I have been struggling ever since (apart from 3-4 months totally off poker) at €20nl and it wasn't until earlier this year I actually got around to doing something about it.

I enlisted in coaching, and after 6 sessions I've realized two things:

1. How poorly I played and how little thought I put into my game during 2010.
2. How bad €20nl at NoiQ (entraction) were due to being infested with race-grinders (top stake for micro-promotions).
   

Two weeks back after discussing with my coach I cashed out my BR and moved to FTP. Feeling positive about things I headed out to get a feel for the games which felt refreshingly soft in comparison to the reg-infested tables at NoiQ, however the positive feeling would not last long. I soon started running poorly, and as a result of this I started playing poorly. It all built up to yesterday and my first ever (almost) $100 pot which can be seen below, after which I looked for a place to scream, to cry, to recouperate, and after some thought came to the conclusion; I'm starting a blog.                                                                                                                                                                                                       History behind this hand: I had PTR'd the villain, and he's a reg w/ almost 600k hands played on $25nl with $13k profits over 2 years. The very hand before this one I had bluffed villain off a $20 3bet-pot with AQo IP.

(Villains stats) hands: 438, vpip/pfr: 26/16, F3b: 43% (7), AgF(flop): 39% (79), raise cbet: 5% (19)                                   Full Tilt Poker $25.00 No Limit Hold'em - 5 players -

DeucesCracked Poker Videos Hand History Converter

BTN: $46.61
Hero (SB): $47.51
BB: $25.00
UTG: $34.19
CO: $26.97

Pre Flop: ($0.35) Hero is SB with Q Q
UTG calls $0.25, CO calls $0.25, BTN raises to $1.35, Hero raises to $4.50, 1 fold, UTG calls $4.25, 1 fold, BTN calls $3.15

Flop: ($14.00) 5 Q 2(3 players)
Hero bets $8.75, UTG folds, BTN raises to $20, Hero raises to $43.01, BTN calls $22.11 all in

Turn: ($98.22) K(2 players - 1 is all in)

River: ($98.22) T(2 players - 1 is all in)

Final Pot: $98.22
BTN shows T Q
Hero shows Q Q
BTN wins $95.22
(Rake: $3.00)

And when summarising my first two weeks at FTP it looked this way; (11bi below EV. fml.)

I do feel I can beat $25nl. I do admit I probably wouldn't have lost last month if I wouldn't have had any spewwy moments. I hope I am at the point now where I have finally realized how spewwing, no matter how good it feels when tilted, never gets u closer to your goal - more likely farther from it - making the climp up so much harder when u come back the next day to get out of the pit u dug for yourself spewwing.

Hopefully I'll be able to stay in my zone of tranquility from now on, stop fpsing and actually fold vs passives showing aggression. Next time I'll try to keep the post shorter aswell, I tip my hat off to any1 who actually read through my whole wall of text, wp sir!

(TLDR; my history, why I started this blog, some whine, looking bright at the future, promise not to write such a long blog post next time, ty for reading!)